One NFL team is proposing to ban the Brotherly Shove

Other teams should stop complaining and get in the weight room tbqh.

When a team wins the Super Bowl, like the Philadelphia Eagles did earlier this month, other teams may try and adopt a successful play or formation from the champions and install it for their own team the following season. Or, if they are incapable of replicating what the best team in the league did the year before, they might just try and legislate the successful play out of the league.

Per NFL Network reporter Judy Battista, that’s exactly what “an unnamed team” is trying to do this off-season!

The Tush Push, or The Brotherly Shove if you’re in polite company, has been a hallmark of the Eagles dominance over the past few seasons. Whenever the Birds need a yard, Jalen Hurts (who squats 600 pounds by the way) lines up under Cam Jurgens, or Jason Kelce before him, and then the entire team moves the defense back one yard and Hurts picks up the first down.

Teams have been bitching and moaning about this play for YEARS now, saying that it takes no skill or it is dangerous to defenders or…I’m sorry, all I can hear right now is the sound of dozens of babies crying because they can’t reach their bottle. Battista went on to note that the play is “run so infrequently that there isn’t enough injury data for the league to push for a ban based on injuries alone.”

It makes you wonder how bad all of these other teams are at such a simple, “no skill involved” play that none of them are able to run it successfully with any consistency. Really makes you think! It ALSO makes you wonder which team of crybaby losers proposed this ban?

Was it the Kansas City Chiefs who just got their shit rocked in the Super Bowl? Was it the Washington Commanders who just got THEIR shit rocked in the NFC Championship Game despite sending a defender literally flying over the line of scrimmage (which is probably more likely to cause a serious injury imo) to try and stop the Tush Push? Was it the Dallas Cowboys who have been getting their shit rocked for decades by the Eagles and most other teams in the league?

An underdog team that may have proposed this? The Green Bay Packers. Recently, Packers president Mark Murphy was answering questions from fans and Jon from Kenosha asked, “What are your thoughts on the Brotherly Shove or the Tush Push? It seems that the Eagles have perfected it.”

First of all, you are exactly right Kenosha Jon…the Eagles HAVE perfected it. Second of all, you can read Murphy’s whiny answer in the embedded tweet below. Some highlights that Murphy was able to articulate, presumably while blowing his nose and wiping away tears, include:

• “I am not a fan of this play.”
• “There is no skill involved”
• “The play is bad for the game”

Murphy ended his screed with this gem: “[Banning the play] would bring back the traditional QB sneak. That worked pretty well for Bart Starr and the Packers in the Ice Bowl.” Ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha, what the hell does that even mean?!?!?

I say this, with all due respect, as the son of a father who is a lifelong Packers fan and has a signed Bart Starr hat in his closet somewhere…FUCK BART STARR, THE ICE BOWL, AND THIS DUMBASS ANSWER! Maybe work on getting your current quarterback prepared to take a snap from under center, Mark, and then get back to the rest of us.

Anyways, you can’t ban a play (that doesn’t cause grievous injury) because one team is too good at it. Did they ban the pick and roll because John Stockton and Karl Malone were too good at it? Did they tell Nolan Ryan to stop throwing so hard? Did they tell Pele he could only dribble with one foot? Did they tell Michael Phelps to stop having such a long wingspan?

No, because those sports didn’t succumb to losers complaining about getting beat. The rest of the NFL should spend more time in the weight room this off-season and less time trying to lawyer their way out of an ass-mashing at the hands of the Eagles offensive line.